Stop Expecting You from Others: 10 Rules for Happiness.

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Lonely girl
Lonely girl

“Don’t blame people for disappointing you. Blame yourself for expecting too much from them.” Blaming either side doesn’t help, I guess. You live once. So living your life to the fullest is up to you. It is okay to make mistakes, it is totally fine to expect from others to a certain extent. But key to happiness lies where you accept more and expect less as possible. The more we expect from others, the more we disappoint. When our expectations are not met, our eyes are blurred. When things go wrong, the blow is hard. It seems unbearable and feels terrible. But trust me! Everything is temporary, so does pain. On our way to success, we often need to stop expecting you from others. So let me give you a free advice on shaping your happy life.

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Rule no 01: Respect and reflect yourself.

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Self esteem and dignity are vital for a solid personality. No matter, how small or big you feel about you, never try to look down on you. At times, kith and kin will stand for you. But there are moments you need to heal yourself with your own efforts. If you are not going to treat you properly, the society would never do it for you. You reflect the perfect you. If you expect respect from the world, it is what you need to give to the world.

Rule no 02: Stop expect others to listen to you.

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Look at your five fingers. They hardly look alike. That is the way with people. Every one is different from every other one. Each person has his own views and ideas. That is why there are different philosophies, religions and cultures. Just because you have an idea on something, you can’t except others to believe you or listen to you. If you do so, you will invite disappointment wherever you go. So speak when you have listeners, not when everyone babbles. And be silent and peaceful, if it is hard to convince that you are right. If you are right, the truth will bounce back as a rubber ball hidden under water.

Rule no 03: Don’t over depend on anyone.

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Let us face the bitter reality. How many people have promised to stay with you? How many times they have vowed that they loved you to the moon and back? Could they stay longer when you needed them to? It is okay to pat on your own back yourself. Because life is a terrible journey that you have to take alone. If you face a problem, first try to answer it your way. Don’t panic if you don’t find a way out. It is fine to be clueless, but it is not fine to expect answers from others when you yourself don’t find any.

Rule no 04: understanding you and them.

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People around the world, have their own life stories to relate. Some have started under the giant green trees and comforting breeze of hills, but some are from slums, palaces or whatever setting. Each of them is unique and valuable because they have influenced them to become the person who they are today. Therefore, life is not easy for anyone. It has its own hardships no matter who he is. That is why we can’t blame anyone for not understanding everyone. But we all can give it a try. We all can spare a thought on how other people face their own struggles each day. Understanding that simple thing offers us insight how to deal with others in the world. So we can hurt less, and comfort more.

Rule no 05: Finding the missing piece.

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This is quite interesting because people have faith on someone special in their lives. They expect such a superhero to appear at any point of their lives. Sometimes it happens, sometimes not. No matter you find that one or not, you cannot put your weight on that person. People come to your life because they love the way your are. If they find you a burden, their views may vary. So, don’t expect someone else to fulfill your dreams. They have their own dreams which may not tally with yours.8 if you yourself is capable of achieving things alone, you will develop a healthy relationship with others as well.  

Rule no 06: Stop expecting from boyfriend, from parents, from your partner or from your friends.

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“I don’t wanna run away, baby you’re the one I need tonight
No promises”

This is what Shane Ward sings with a kind of sarcasm attached at the end “no promises”. Promises are beautiful when they are kept. But they are not always met. Our loved ones and even other people too promise to do things for us. Sometimes, we expect someone to act in a certain way that makes us happy. It is true that we expect our parents to love us, take care of us, pay our tuition fees and food, but at the same time, we need to know that they can abstain doing them.  You can’t always expect your boyfriend to speak with soft words and bring you gifts. He can also go through difficult times that your helping hand is needed and appreciated. So learn to accept things and stop expecting in relationships.

Rule no o7: Be positive and stop expecting things to go wrong.

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I hope you may have read the famous novel ‘Alchemist by Paulo Coelho who clearly explains the law of attraction. When things go wrong, we start blaming destiny and bad luck. But luck depends on what we do to make us lucky. If we have faith, we can see the silver line in every dark cloud. We need to see a beautiful dream, towards which we take small steps. The more we believe in this goal, the more paths will open for us to take.

Rule no 08: All is fair in love and war.

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This is important not only in love and war nowadays. Life is tough and it allows only the surviving party to win. So that people are caught up in this continuous rat race. They are ready to commit whatever makes them live comfortably. Therefore, expecting fairness in society is a daydream. You will be rejected at some places where you shouldn’t have. You will learn how corrupted the world is and you will suffer for other’s acts. This is because life is unfair and unequal for all of us.

Rule no 09: Stop Expecting Things to be Easy:

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Rome was not built in a day. It takes time for you to build a strong personality to take the challenges and accept what the world throws at you. However, the process is hard. It takes time and you need patience. You can achieve what you dream with lots of efforts and dedications. This is going to need you to take big steps that you didn’t prepare earlier. But that is alright. Everyone has his own way, own story, so do you.

Rule no 10: Ask for advice and help.

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In this long life journey, you will encounter storms that you have never known before. There may be people like your parents and elders who can physically and mentally help you to get through. So do not give up on people just because someone once fooled you or left you. Sometimes there might not be a hidden agenda and it can be a second chance that is showing up. So trust with sanity, care with no expectations and help with no regrets.

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